As women, personal safety is an ever-present concern in our lives. There is no doubt that the world generally feels far more unsafe for women than it does for men, starting from a young age. In fact, most of us take habitual precautions that we don’t even think about anymore. Do you carry pepper spray, a personal alarm, or some other safety tool hooked on your purse? Do you have personal “rules” about not walking alone or coming home alone after dark? Do you ever check over your shoulder when you sense someone walking a short distance behind you? Maybe you’ve even taken a self-defense class and casually discussed the tips you learned with friends. While there is comfort in having these tools and words of advice in our repertoire, it is unfortunate that this defensive mindset is a necessary part of our daily lives.
According to statistics, women in their 20s, especially ages 20-24, are at the greatest risk of major threats to their safety. In fact, it is estimated that 1 in 5 women will be victims of rape or attempted rape during college; worse yet, less than 5% of these rapes are thought to be reported. Essentially, a phase of life that should be enjoyable and relatively carefree is also the most dangerous for women. While these safety concerns remain throughout our lives, young women clearly have to deal with them the most, especially in their early years living alone or away from home. We all want to enjoy our younger years without placing excessive limitations on ourselves, but doing so without taking precautions naturally creates concerns of making yourself a target.
Adding to this personal dilemma is the prevalence of victim-blaming. Not only are we as individuals used to taking disproportionate precautions compared to men, but our society around us has become used to this, too, feeding the culture of victim-blaming. The common questions of “What were you wearing?” and “Had you been drinking?” that rape and assault victims face will wrongly appear justified to many because of the normalization of women having to guard their safety to a far greater extent than men. What you wear or how you spend your time out with friends should not put your personal safety at risk, yet it’s difficult to make even these basic decisions without worrying about worst-case scenarios.
This creates a difficult balance for women to manage when it comes to day-to-day risks. At what point does being cautious about your personal safety infringe on your ability to live your life? And at what point does making choices independent of safety concerns put you in danger? While these are questions that men and women alike have to answer at times, they are more constantly present in daily life for women, and unfortunately, there are no simple answers. However, there are things we can do to protect ourselves that do not limit how we spend our time, such as keeping a personal safety alarm, app, or other tool accessible, being aware of the people around us, and letting a friend know approximately where you’ll be when you go out. Above all, always trust your instincts when you’re in a new or unfamiliar situation. It can be difficult to strike the right balance between caution and independence, but your awareness and intuition can be powerful tools in finding this middle ground.
Sources:
https://now.org/resource/violence-against-women-in-the-united-states-statistic/