Change – it’s something that we all experience over the course of our lives but that never becomes completely comfortable. Whether you’ve spent your whole life in the same city or have moved frequently, whether you’ve had a consistent career path or changed jobs multiple times, whether your family life has been stable or uncertain, you’ve undoubtedly faced a next step that felt dauntingly unfamiliar. Even the changes we naturally expect can be intimidating. Starting high school, getting your first job, or moving away from home, for example, are all changes that we know to be part of life but that still can shake us as we anticipate a new phase of life. So how can we come to embrace these new beginnings instead of dreading them?
It is true that some of us tend to relish change more than others. The idea of starting over or trying something new can make change very appealing to certain personalities, but uncertainty will still inevitably creep in. When this happens, it’s often not the change itself that we are worried about, but the potential secondary consequences. If you’re starting at a new job or school, it isn’t the new opportunity or different type of work that seems intimidating – it’s the “what if” surrounding the other unwanted changes that could come about. What if I end up without friends at my new job? What if I don’t have time for other things I care about because of my new schedule? What if I regret leaving where I was before?
In my various experiences with change, from moving multiple times to transferring schools, I’ve found it reassuring in the midst of these “what ifs” to remind myself of the things that won’t change during a transition. In fact, it’s not uncommon to look back on a period of change and realize that your life has not actually changed as drastically as you expected. You’re still the same person with the same personality, the same character, the same internal struggles, and the same background as you were before the transition – only your environment or circumstances have changed. Even noticing small things that remain the same can help ground you during a period of change, whether that’s your morning routine before work, the weekend activity you always look forward to, or the day of the week you always call your best friend. Once you realize that you won’t lose your sense of self as things around you are changing, new situations seem far less foreign and daunting.
Finally, it’s also important to remember how much good can come from a change of pace. Even if you’re dealing with a change that wasn’t exactly what you wanted, there is still plenty to look forward to about a new chapter. The uncertainty can, of course, be intimidating, but it can also be the most thrilling part of starting something new. Maybe you have some idea of what a change will entail in the short term, but you don’t yet know the new people, experiences, and memories that this path holds in the future. Unique opportunities or relationships could come about that you never otherwise would have found. Ultimately, while change is always something that can make us hesitate, the benefits of resisting this hesitation can make us forever grateful for having the courage to start a new chapter.